When HE doesn’t do what I want…


Today in church I was startled by a thought… You know, one of those times when you can’t tell if you came up with the thought, you heard it somewhere, or the Holy Spirit brought it to mind.

It startled me by the blatant simplicity, how I haven’t looked deeply at the concept before(?)…

Palm Sunday.

Yes. Jesus entering Jerusalem. Jesus being lauded as the coming king. 

They shouted “hosanna!” Which I believe means, “Save us!”

Only days later would they shout “Crucify him!”

They were shouting for him to bring them a new life, to bring in the new promised kingdom, to save them from the dominion of the Romans.

He didn’t do what they wanted.

So they shouted for his crucifixion.

He wasn’t the conquering warrior saving from all of their pain, all of their physical and societal oppression that they wanted. He came to conquer a deeper pain than they even knew existed. He was killing the very death that wanted to swallow them up forever by dying for them.

This all starts back when Adam and Eve did the opposite of what God Himself wanted. He wanted them to be near Him, but in love, He gave them the choice to obey. This is volition. 

They turned away from Him and toward the lie…The lie that everything could be found apart from Him. That He was really hiding the best from them…holding out on them. 

This is what brought Him bloodied and disfigured before them as they shouted for His death. Unknown to them, they were shouting for a truer salvation than the days prior. 

He didn’t do what they wanted.

This looked like a disappointment to them I imagine. Here he was, mocked, standing before the very Romans they wanted Him to dethrone. 

What do I do when He doesn’t do what I want?

Do I shout “crucify him!” In my heart? 

Do I turn away from the living God because my plans don’t look like the salvation I want? 

Ouch.

Do I want the deeper salvation? The deeper winning? 

When the pain is allowed into my life I struggle to see how this could be good. I struggle to see how God can allow or even ordain the mess that can bring heartache. I struggle 

His suffering was a mess. It was gutted and bleeding and stripped flesh to see bone.

It wasn’t wanted. But it was good. 

They wanted jewels and a golden crown, a kingly horse and chariot. They wanted enemies crushed and battles won for them.

I want easy, comfortable existence, little pleasures, and a beautiful, perfect life. Oftentimes, if I’m honest, I don’t like His way. 

As He was crushing their ultimate enemy winning the biggest battle, He begged His Father to forgive them…because they didn’t know what they were doing.

He was in perfect control I the midst of their rage, in the midst of their mocking, in the midst of their ingratitude. 

I don’t want to miss the deeper salvation in my life. 

How does your reaction to God’s ways show your relationship to Him? Do you want Him for the kind of life He can give you, or do you want the beauty of who He really is? I know for myself, I don’t want to be with God when it seems to hard or too much work. I need to put forth the time to sit down and ask Him to show me a truer picture of who He really is…beyond all that my mind thinks it knows of Him.

These are questions I really have to ask myself. Here lies stuff that I need to assess in light of Him. How about You?

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